


you were the best part of my life (and my last regret)

by bittersweet memories (tgtfaf)



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Flowers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 12:32:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12059067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tgtfaf/pseuds/bittersweet%20memories
Summary: Daniel’s trying to move on but it’s hard, really. He doesn’t even know if he wants to move on and he’s not okay.





	you were the best part of my life (and my last regret)

"I've been doing okay, I guess. I've started going to work again, and working out at the gym. Hyunbinnie goes with me sometimes, he recently got another modelling gig and we went out last Friday to celebrate. With Jisung, Seonho and Minhyun. The rest couldn’t make it though. They try to distract me, subtly, but I do notice. I guess I've grown more sensitive after that time." A dry, yet so horribly sad laugh somehow slips its way out.

"There's almost always someone sleeping over and having lunch with me. Jihoon transferred to my innisfree branch two weeks ago, so we go for lunch together now. There's a new store around the corner, they have this special beef ramen that I know you'll love." He doesn’t realize his voice cracks halfway.

"Jaehwan started taking culinary courses, I think Minhyun has been influencing him too much. They still live together; Minhyun complains a lot about Jaehwan and his untidy habits, but the place is always spotless whenever I go over. Jaehwan let me try his cooking that day, it's not bad, but his omurice and beef will never taste as good as yours." His voice goes a pitch softer at the end but no one notices.

"Guanlin's Korean is improving, or at least I think it is. He made a really bad pun that day and Jisung thinks it’s because he still can't pronounce properly but honestly, there's no way Guanlin could've made an innuendo if his Korean was as bad as when we first met. The chicks have part time jobs now; Seonho works at this cute café, he gives me discounts when I come by. I don't go by very often, it’s a bit far to walk and I've stopped taking the bus.

"I passed by that café you used to go to when finals were coming up. I thought I saw you with your iced Americano, bent over your notes. Jinyoung invited me in, but I couldn't stay for more than a minute without being reminded of you. I remember coming here to drag you out of your caffeine-induced study dreams.

"Remember when Daehwi convinced us to try his fancy Starbucks drink with almond milk or something like that? We were so convinced it was the worst coffee we've ever tasted that we dragged him to taste what true coffee tastes like. Jinyoung says he visits often now. Samuel is convinced they like each other. You should see how red Jinyoung's small face turns whenever we mention Daehwi. Daehwi's applying for a job there but he told me not to tell the rest, we know they'll tease him." He smiles ever so slightly at the memory.

"The weather is nice today. It’s bright yet not too harsh, there's a lot of clouds and a small breeze. It’s just like that day we went for a picnic in Central Park. I tried to make some jelly but it turned out horribly wrong. Of course you brought your wonderful sandwiches. I still can't make them. Your recipe is still on the fridge, I tried once but it doesn’t taste the same. It tastes different when someone you love makes it for you, don’t you think?

"I overheard Jisung talking to Sungwoon that day. They were talking about you. They must've thought I was sleeping. They miss you. We all do. The apartment has been so empty without you. Even when the whole gang is here, it doesn’t feel complete anymore. It's been five months and I still see you at every corner I turn. The world is too cold without your bright smile and bad jokes.

"Jisung says you would want me to move on. I think you would too." He brushes away a stray tear.

"Seongwoo, it’s so hard. It really is."

"You never told me what your favorite flower was, so I brought you lilies today. They're white and they remind me so much of you. They even smell like that cologne you wear.

"You should be here to smell it. Seongwoo, you idiot. You shouldn’t have taken the bus that day. You shouldn't have gone out to get groceries, I should have done that instead of asking you to. They were right, you never know the true value of something until you lose it. Seongwoo, you shouldn't have been so nice to me. Maybe you would still be here today." By now he is sobbing quietly, not bothering to wipe away his tears anymore. They fall, sprinkling the flowers like fresh morning dew.

"Minhyun still sings that song. The one about rain, and I always think of you. Sometimes I'd end up crying in front of all of them and Jisung still watches over me, scolding them for 'making Daniel cry again'.

"I have to go now, Minhyun is calling me over. I probably look like a wreck. He has a license now, and he's the one driving me to visit you." He dries his cheeks and lays the flowers down across the grave.

"I'm sorry I couldn't be a better person to you."

 

_I miss you._

**Author's Note:**

> THANK YOU TO THE WONDERFUL @sehyxns for beta-ong this for me <3
> 
>  
> 
> __


End file.
